- 1 in 10 teenagers experience domestic abuse in their dating relationships.
- 1 in 4 teenagers in relationships will experience digital abuse from their boyfriend or girlfriend.
- 2 women a week are killed by a current or former partner.
- 16-24 years olds are most at risk of domestic abuse.
Abuse isn’t always obvious, it starts gradually by trapping you into a false sense of security. Ashley was a popular young woman who had a job and a family. At the start of the program Reece is understanding and takes a real interest in her life and work. This gradually changes until he is so possessive he attacks her in front of her colleagues.
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It’s hard to define the exact moment that care turns into control, and this is the reality of all abusive relationships. Is it when he first lifts her dress strap up for her in the club or when he demands to know who she’s been texting?
“I just want to see who my competition is.”
“It’s the other guys I don’t trust, I mean look at ya” he subtly blames her looks, for his unjustified jealously.
3 months into the relationship she tells him she’s pregnant. He persuades her to keep the baby: “I didn’t even know I wanted that until you said it and now I can’t get the picture out of my head” again making her the cause of his actions.
All these subtle moments in which he indirectly holds her accountable are what will eventually lead to her inability to walk away.
“I couldn’t leave him, not because of a single moment.”
“He’s the man crying in front of me like a boy at the thought of losing me.”
“I went back because of everything good that came before this day.”
Is what she says after the first time he attacks her. This reflects the reason many young women will stay in a abusive relationship. Hopefully Murdered By My Boyfriend has gone some way to challenging these feeling of responsibility and loyalty and will be the reason more girls will be able to safely walk away in the future.
It sends out a clear message that the actions of an abusive boyfriend are irrational and undeserved. When Ashley discovers Reece has been cheating he instantly flips the blame onto her. "You’re sick. …I treat you like a princess and what do you do? You accuse me.” “I don’t understand why you keep doing this to me, I don’t understand why you keep doing this to yourself”
Of course finding out your boyfriend and the father of your child is cheating on you is “doing it to yourself”, naturally it would be unthinkable that possibly he caused this and her reaction is totally and utterly justified.
From the perspective of someone who’s experienced domestic abuse the program was difficult to watch. But it’s also empowering to see these hidden problems being talked about. When Ashley tries to stand up against Reece but eventually gets persuaded back, she definitely doesn’t appear weak. No one could say, “Actually that was her fault”.
We need to remember her situation applies to every girl suffering domestic violence. Only when someone has been forced under the control of men like “Reece” can they not be free to see the reality of what is being done to them.
So for next time you’re questioning, did I provoke it? Maybe it was my fault? Ask yourself Would you tell Ashley it was her fault?
If everyone who watched Murdered By My Boyfriend could see inside any emotionally or physically violent relationship, they would be horrified.
“I just want to see who my competition is.”
“It’s the other guys I don’t trust, I mean look at ya” he subtly blames her looks, for his unjustified jealously.
3 months into the relationship she tells him she’s pregnant. He persuades her to keep the baby: “I didn’t even know I wanted that until you said it and now I can’t get the picture out of my head” again making her the cause of his actions.
All these subtle moments in which he indirectly holds her accountable are what will eventually lead to her inability to walk away.
“I couldn’t leave him, not because of a single moment.”
“He’s the man crying in front of me like a boy at the thought of losing me.”
“I went back because of everything good that came before this day.”
Is what she says after the first time he attacks her. This reflects the reason many young women will stay in a abusive relationship. Hopefully Murdered By My Boyfriend has gone some way to challenging these feeling of responsibility and loyalty and will be the reason more girls will be able to safely walk away in the future.
It sends out a clear message that the actions of an abusive boyfriend are irrational and undeserved. When Ashley discovers Reece has been cheating he instantly flips the blame onto her. "You’re sick. …I treat you like a princess and what do you do? You accuse me.” “I don’t understand why you keep doing this to me, I don’t understand why you keep doing this to yourself”
Of course finding out your boyfriend and the father of your child is cheating on you is “doing it to yourself”, naturally it would be unthinkable that possibly he caused this and her reaction is totally and utterly justified.
From the perspective of someone who’s experienced domestic abuse the program was difficult to watch. But it’s also empowering to see these hidden problems being talked about. When Ashley tries to stand up against Reece but eventually gets persuaded back, she definitely doesn’t appear weak. No one could say, “Actually that was her fault”.
We need to remember her situation applies to every girl suffering domestic violence. Only when someone has been forced under the control of men like “Reece” can they not be free to see the reality of what is being done to them.
So for next time you’re questioning, did I provoke it? Maybe it was my fault? Ask yourself Would you tell Ashley it was her fault?
If everyone who watched Murdered By My Boyfriend could see inside any emotionally or physically violent relationship, they would be horrified.